My fiancée, Liv, and I had planned our wedding for November 2025 in our Brooklyn neighborhood. As a wedding writer and editor with years of experience covering celebrations, it has been so overwhelmingly exciting to finally work on planning my own celebration. But when I woke up on that Wednesday, the first thing I did was to turn to Liv and tell her that we should get legally married at City Hall in the next few months. I expected her to protest and say I was overreacting, but she agreed it was not a bad idea. Our text group chat with our parents agreed, too. We didn’t know the future, but we thought that if we had a legal marriage now, it would be harder to void it later. And, if we ever needed to move to another country, the immigration process together might be easier. I was not alone in this idea. After a quick DM check-in with another queer, engaged friend in the wedding industry Jove Meyer, he said he had the exact same conversation that morning with his fiancé. Clearly, the ticking clock was loud enough for us all to hear.

Both Liv and I had planned to try on wedding dresses today. She was going with her mom and aunt to a trunk show, and I was going to try a Monique Lhuillier gown I loved at Bridal Fashion Week. Liv wanted to cancel her appointment, but I reassured her that she should go and not miss the chance to try on a dress she had loved for months. Plus, it would be helpful to see her family on this hard day.

I got brunch (and a much-needed mimosa) with two friends, then headed uptown. The happy demeanors of women shopping around me felt strange and jarring, but the bridal stylist I would be working with, Carson Overby, set me at ease. As a fellow gay, engaged person, he shared his fears and a very real discussion he also had with his fiancé—who is currently living in Texas—about getting married at City Hall in a few weeks. He was scared that he wouldn’t have the right to visit him in the hospital if he got hurt or sick in such a red state. It helped to talk through our excitement around our big wedding plans—and strategize how we might want to protect ourselves, too.