Doja Cat is in the middle of viral internet madness again, but this one hits differently — because why are we still invalidating people’s experiences in 2025?
Doja had a fan interaction that she later responded to X users about —and what followed was an onslaught of backlash toward her that, quite frankly, was entirely unwarranted.
The person in the video with Doja is Pablo Tomayo, an influencer with over 400k followers on TikTok.
Pablo designs custom jewelry and has even interacted with Paris Hilton, Rihanna, and Saweetie, who received his products. So, let’s establish that Pablo’s been doing this for a hot minute.
In the video, it appears that Pablo is standing next to Doja outside of an event and gives her the actual shirt off his back, which is part of his collab with Melimayystudios.
Pablo and Doja share a hug and a friendly kiss before ending the video by jumping up and down in celebration. Based on the reactions, the internet loved how Doja interacted with Pablo.
Appearances are not always what they seem on the surface. Based on a series of X posts a week later, the reality is that Doja didn’t quite enjoy the interaction.
Doja posted a now-deleted X post, saying, “bottom line is i’ll smile at you but it doesn’t mean I fuck w you and don’t touch me and man handle me when you don’t even fuckin know me. iykyk. i honestly think I need to stand up for myself in the moment sometimes. and he didn’t even know my fuckin name to be touching me and kissing me on my face like that is crazy.”
An X user responded that they thought she was feeling the interaction, and when they asked for context, Doja said, “i was very drunk idk what to tell you.”
She added in a now-deleted X post she “threw that musty ass shirt away,” referring to the shirt he gave her off his back. When someone responded that they thought she said he “smelt good,” Doja explained why she didn’t enjoy the interaction. “He did but i don’t like how comfortable he was touching me and kissing me without asking permission,” she wrote.
When word got around to Pablo that Doja talked about the situation on X, he responded with a TikTok video. “I just want to clear this up because it hurts because I loved her. I watched her at Coachella. I never claimed to be the biggest fan, but I stan her and I think her work is amazing.”
“I would’ve never wanted to make her uncomfortable. I would’ve never filmed if she didn’t say yes. That video that we filmed was after everything,” he continued. “I understand that she has to set her boundaries. She’s a celebrity. I’m not. I will never understand that, so I value that… I appreciate and I get that.”
“I apologize if I did anything wrong at all,” he said. “I know I didn’t know her first. I never claimed to be the biggest fan ever. I just respect her a lot for her work.”
Here’s the thing. We must learn to be accountable for doing things we didn’t intend to do. I don’t believe any party in this situation is a villain, but I think it’s fair for Doja to admit that she might not have enjoyed the interaction despite what we see in the video. It’s also fair for Pablo to be disheartened by the new development. Perhaps going on X wasn’t the best solution, hence why the messages were deleted, but the response to her feelings was disgusting.
Here’s the one that Doja specially responded to:
What distorted timeline of parasocial stan culture do we exist in that we’re suddenly accepting “she kissed back” and “I thought you were feeling it” as invitations to invade someone’s personal space? It’s honestly hard to tell whether or not the reactions are just a product of the vitriolic stan culture or if this is genuinely how we respond to a person’s experience.
A person speaking their truth isn’t an invitation for you to double down on your keyboard bigotry. I hope Doja and Pablo can make amends, but in the meantime, the bashing of women online needs to be checked at the door.